10.12.11

List #116: Single Girl Christmas #2

December is for nostalgia. We've got Santa and decades of ornaments. There is time off for preparing, twinkling battling it out for classy and gaudy, gift wrapping and giving and receiving. December is watching the same television specials we watched twenty years ago and baking the same cookies as our grandmothers.

And today my thoughts were wrapped in nostalgia. My morning was spent creating holiday magic for children; a twist on a library event I first started last year. The evening spent shopping with my mom and watching Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas; our mother-daughter tradition we had hoped would fill us with cheer. And our conversation drifted us to the sad: missed loved ones, those less fortunate, Christmases spent by hospital beds, the lost magic those children from my morning possess. Quite honestly, I think we were both holding back tears as we weaved in out of racks at Macy's and shuffled the crowds of Apple. Sometimes, Christmas isn't always fun as an adult.

So, for my second single girl Christmas list, I'm giving you a few my adult memories (or not-so-memories) that warm my heart and make me proud.
  • I remember watching Elf for the first time with a college roommate and laughing so much I think we were in tears. And tonight I'm grateful for laughs in all the right places, no matter where I'm watching. No matter who is watching with me.
  • Rhodes, Greece. An old man who couldn't understand the mass, a Creche that even blew me away, an unconcerned taxi driver. 
  • I remember grabbing the Christmas gifts she made us on the night that every thing changed. My memory wants me to believe it was out of protection, not spite. But she's not here anymore and no part of her heart should have been left in his clutter.
  • How many times has my Dad cried on Christmas Day? The count has been lost. 
  • I cannot what remember what I gave last Christmas. And the absence of memory is worth so much better than I could have hoped.
  • Christmas Eve dinner, in a garage with a wood-burning stove and sexy women posted on the walls. This is our family, this is our book, and love fills the room.
So dear readers, what are your adult Christmas memories? Which ones make you most proud of where you've come from and how far you've traveled? 

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