But I'm less sad than I was this morning, and even less angry because anger is a silly feeling to hold on to. If I can survive every day of my week, let go of all the stories & future I want to share with him, release the love I have for him, stop asking questions and stop wondering about him, then I will be okay. And honestly? Most days I can tackle these things. In little, tiny, baby steps. I think it should be known that I'm not a mess most days. In fact it's quite the opposite.
So because I don't want to end this day on a sad note, I'm writing another list. I must admit, it's harder for me to come up with this than this morning's. I feel stuck between a rock & a hard place, lately. Many situations in my life are not what I thought they'd be in 2011. But we all hit speed bumps, right?
Things I Love at the Moment:
1. I have good friends who are there in times of need. I honestly felt warmth & kindness spill over me this afternoon. Thank you.
2. Twitter. I think I've said this before, but having a creative outlet that funny, intelligent women read really makes me happy.
3. Mumford & Sons. The CD I requested for the ex arrived at the library just a few days after he broke it off. And now I have it on my iTunes to ease the sad and make me happy.
4. I get to do work that is my passion every day. And I'm excited because I honestly feel that there is someone out there who respects this and wants to be a part of it, waiting for me.
5. Books & bathtubs. Two of my favorite simple things that always make my heart happy.
6. Great Lakes Christmas Ale. I bought the ex a secret case that I was saving for after the holidays as a surprise. It's his favorite, I drank some this weekend & after this case, will probably never drink it again.
And with that, I ask what makes you angry, sad, happy, lovelies? Here's to the power of a positive week.